This is my ballad of big nothing. But here goes like always...
I'm so happy I was in your presence all. day. long.
I had a little moment to myself as you got up to shower. Something Corporate.
I couldn't even commit to try and put how I felt at that particular moment into words or symbols.
Even though this tension is put between us, I feel it makes me even more strongly attracted to you. You haven't given up on me.
"I think you love me."
Maybe I do. Maybe it's so real I don't believe myself.
I feel so good around you. Like I can be myself--Independent, WEIRD, and funny. It's really an incredible feeling.
So close, so fast.
I like who you are.
I want who you are.
The look on your face always lights up a room. Soul searching.
I just want to feel you close to me.
If I had to give it up today, would I be able to just walk away?
------
I'm scared.
I'm scared to try and commit to you, but then fuck it up.
It's always my fault.
I dont want to waste your time, or your feelings.
I wouldn't want to ruin something so good.
I'm afraid of distance.
Maybe this time around I won't.
Maybe you're worth it...
Show me.
But as I lay here watching Yes Man eating red velvet cake yogurt, I lay awake and miss you.
At least i'll have some comfort as I fall asleep alone.
Neutral Milk Hotel, and no clothes.
Maybe i love you and maybe you dont have to feel like you shouldnt believe yourself. because its all true. im scared too. distance is scary, but if i had to walk away today, i couldnt do it. i couldnt do it 2 months from now...i feel close to you as you do with me. "i think you love me"
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